I wanna stand up and shout through a megaphone! Listen, idiot Americans! South Africa shows us exactly what’s going to happen here now that Donald is gone!

But I’m torn, too, between just shutting up and letting the little birdie in my ear prove me remarkably prescient.

I’ve compared America to South Africa for well into a decade, ever since the goof, Jacob Zuma, ascended to the presidency in South Africa. The political parallels of the two countries are so obvious. Want to know what’s going to happen, here? Look backwards a few years at South Africa.

Before I remind you of the parallels and signs I think it’s time to convince you the comparison is true:

Many westerners and probably a large majority of Americans lump South Africans with Africans in general and embrace Donald Trump’s studied thesis that Africa is nothing more than “shithole” countries.

So how on earth can the politics of one of those “shithole” countries be more consequentially advanced than ours in America?

There are few places in Africa as backwards as much of Appalachia or hill-billy America, and hill-billy America extends far beyond the South. Where I live at the junction of very rural parts of three states – Wisconsin, Iowa and Illinois – I’m closer to hill-billy America than to the city of Chicago.

If I were to randomly extract someone from hill-billy America and randomly extract someone from the slum settlements around Cape Town, there’s no doubt in my mind who would be the better student of virtually any subject, who could fend better in any challenge whatever, or who would more likely succeed in our modern world.

There’s simply no doubt in my mind that if a society is judged by its worst parts, America’s in trouble.

The similarities between American and South Africa begin with their beginnings. Both were settled within a decade or two of each other in the 1600s. Both prospered by the luck of Mother Nature: In America it was the fertile land; in South Africa, gold and diamonds.

Both were built on British colonizers’ brutal oppression of the indigenous populations. Both were strengthened by slavery and both were expanded by turning slavery into a more lasting form of racism.

The modern politics of both nations arose from what I believe was a too radical reaction to British imperialism. This nascent form of democracy of the 18th century was founded on the notion of one-man, one-vote, necessitating the determination that many men weren’t in order to preserve the status quo.

So fast forward to about a decade ago, when a goof became president of South Africa. He was a populist. All the reasons Jacob Zuma came to power are the same reasons Donald Trump came to power.

Both were inept and megalomaniacal. Both sailed to power on the laurels of an established political party that became instantly subservient to them.

Both wasted almost to destruction their governments. Both profited from wanton corruption that was given a blind-eye.

Finally both were replaced by exceptional moderates who promised to return things to what they were. And so rid of the beast what happens next?

The psychologies and reactions of huge numbers of citizens in both countries are cesspools of desperation and failure, products of globalization in an information world that’s killing itself. The goofs Jacob Zuma and Donald Trump offered themselves as simple solutions to overwhelmingly difficult and confusing problems.

But even for the brevity of their reigns their simplicity was too annoying. When you try to reduce global warming to pedophilia even a few of the junkiest StarTrekkers are lost. The sense of being fooled arrives.

But the fall of these idiots was by razor thin political situations and if the level of desperation and string of failures grows, there are lots of people in the universe that will refresh their putrid fantasies.

Jacob Zuma fell and immediately the intelligentsia of South Africa wanted him tried and jailed. Three years later he is still being tried and he is not jailed. South Africans simply can’t get it together to get rid of him altogether. So… he remains a threat to the good side.

Ergo, Donald Trump of America.